Something that I struggle with every spring is preparing myself for the summer. Owning a seasonal business that our family depends on for the entire years income is stressful.
I cry a lot. I worry a lot. I also pray a lot.
I always feel convicted because my first two processes are not rooted in truth! Worry and fear are not from Him. They are seeds of doubt sown by the enemy to steal my joy, my security, my sanity, and my family.
The questions that run through my head are “will this be the year that breaks us?” Or “was I a good enough steward of what He did give us to want to do it again?” LIES!!
Last year I changed the way I prayed, follow me for just a second. Our God is not a general God. He is not a ballpark God. He is a very specific God who’s attention to detail is perfect. Every teeny tiny detail of our lives has been perfectly shaped by Him. So if that is the God we serve, why do I pray generally when I do get to that part of my process? Cry. Worry. Pray a general prayer. I would pray like “Lord, you know what we need so I hope you follow through with that!” Or “You are the one keeping us here so if you want us to stay then you better provide!” Yikes! Scary huh?
Last summer I decided to get more specific. He is a God who delights in us, and we are told in Hebrews to approach the throne of grace with confidence.
Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16
So that is just what I was going to do. Humbling myself before the Lord and bringing my request to Him. I then changed my prayer to ask Him what He was going to do. What was the specific number He was going to provide for us for the year, and you know what? He did it. They number He told me what the number we had at the end of the season! What!!
But then He kept going, He also provided such a sweet gift for a vacation for my husband and I and two of our sweetest friends, and a vacation for us to go explore with our littles.
Did you see that?
The detail that I missed that He caught was paying for us to have time away! To invest in each other and our friends and kids! I am still blown away by His provision!
Moving forward to prepare for this coming year, I know that I am free from worry. I am free from fear. I am free from out of control emotions. I get to stand in full confidence that He is molding our summer and I get to relax in that freedom. PRAISE GOD!!